Long Lost...

I have mend my heart and created walls that will block me away from you. I have made my space where I only need myself and not anyone else, most especially you.

I am hearing things, but never flinch; I don't care.
I am seeing someone beside you, but it never stung my eyes; I don't care.
I smell the same scent, but memories never came back; I don't care.

My body numb.
My heart paralyzed.
My feet won't move me to place.

Where will I be?

Falling to Pieces

The only way to survive is not to fight and win but to learn and earn winning.
I am challenging myself to be as competitive as before.
I am trying my very best to be able to win back what's gratefully mine.
I am encouraging myself to know more, have more and work more.
I am...
I am... Trying...
I am... continuing my life that had stop quite some time.
But I...
I don't know how long will I be able to.

Last night, I am stating a fact, asking some questions... only in my mind...
I am afraid that I might hurt the one I have to ask.
I am afraid that someone might cry in front of me saying I am being insensitive again.
But questions are haunting me more and more.
Answers are nowhere to be found.
I am left hanging, working for nothing.

I have lost a life and now regaining it.
But I am constantly falling each time the same untold stories are being kept in where it doesn't belong.

I feel so untrustworthy.
I feel so useless.

Will someone know I am looking for answers?

Will she know I need the story to be told?

Will she not get mad or hurt by my words that is asking?

Will she not accuse me of accusing?

Will...